(no subject)

Milord,

My sincere apologies, but he had it coming. He started it He attacked me first, dammit My fucking EYE Ever so sorry. Hope the poor thing recovers soon!! Only hit him with a book. Pansy. Oh dammit why won't the old hag just shut up already. I'm supposed to be the loud one

Yours,
Alexander of Meirsu.

(no subject)

Hag.

If she doesn't give it back right now I'm jumping and leaving her to explain why there's an Alexander-shaped mess of blood and guts in front of the manor.